bravenewworld

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With everything going on, I think it goes without saying that we should be treating these new visitors with the utmost respect. The reason, however, might not be what one would immediately think of.

Yes, they come from a very different background. Their theology is very different than ours, and trust me when I say I like the idea of using Poke Balls about as much as anyone else. The machines are dangerous. A lot of us were down there, and we can attest for how much they hurt people and Pokemon alike. It seems all too convenient that they want them back and the only offer they give us is a literal display of skill.

I don't like it. I don't like it at all.

If they want their machines back, I think that they should give us something in return. Something material, something that we can use. We've been able to use the machines for good things as far as research is concerned, but it's very obvious that it's just the tip of the iceberg. What are they hiding? Why are they so tight-fisted when it comes to helping us, when it's very obvious we have something that they want?

I'll be voicing my concerns to someone who will hopefully listen in the next few days. If there are other things people want to add to the quickly growing laundry list of things that should be made apparent to the council, voice them now and I'll address them as I can.

[Filtered to friends]

I wanted to let you all know, I might be disappearing for... a while. I'm returning home, for hopefully a short amount of time, to talk to my father. He's a senior member of the council, and it's been mentioned before that they make decisions that might be viewed as... as detached. I don't know what my feelings are on Team Evolution, but I do know this: We shouldn't be giving them everything that they want. I have a feeling that that might be exactly what the council is thinking of doing, and I'm going to plead my case.

...

Wish me luck.

[Filtered to Fai, backdated to just before Team Evolution's arrival]

Fai, are you in town? I need to talk to you about something, preferably in person.

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[He bites his lip as he thinks, but really, he doesn't want to go anywhere public no matter how much he actually manages to spit out - and it should be said he doesn't have high hopes for himself.]

Where do you stay at the moment? Wouldn't it just be easier if I came there?

Uh..?

[She looks suddenly very nervous.]

I'd rather not meet there, if it's all right with you.

Oh? [He's not sure what to make of the reaction, and he's not letting himself take offense when he actually doesn't know what her reason is. That would be overly sensitive and egocentric.]

Well, would you mind coming to where we're staying, then? We finally got ourselves an actual flat instead of some room somewhere. [A beat.] Yuui is out.

That would probably be best.

[He sends her his address and some directions. Then he spends the time waiting trying not to chew down his nails - which is extremely painful since his nails are a bit thicker and harder than those of an ordinary human - and not being able to sit still. He's still not sure what he wants to have said, or if he can even begin to explain how much he already feels he's changed over this short time.]

[When she knocks he all but flies from the floor, actually teleporting to the door instead of just walking like a normal person. He somehow still manages to smile and not look like a person on the verge of a nervous breadkdown as he opens it.]

Hi. Come in, there's... tea and things.

[The entire trip over, she is in her own head, turning over conversation after conversation. What should she say? What should she do? This was foreign territory for her, and she had no idea how he would react...

She came alone. Camille would try to interject, and this was a conversation that the two blonds needed to have between the two of them, and no one else.

Not hearing him walk to the door and simply opening it surprises the daylights out of her, and she backs up a few steps in surprise.]

...Thank you.

[She walks in, very awkwardly standing in the living room, taking the place in. Should she sit? Stand? What should she be doing? She should probably be the one serving the te--no, no, she shouldn't, they were outside the usual social norms that they were raised in, and this was his home.]

[Of course it's still a very high-end flat, even if it's only has two rooms - Fai and Yuui have always shared a bedroom, and they've seen no reason to change that now. But it's well furnished and has a truly splendid view - and large panoramic windows that will help Fai not feel shut in.]

[It is also devoid of any pokémon, even Babycakes or Blossom, because he felt just the same about the whole situation as she did.]

[Now he ushers Lux gently over to the table, glad that she makes no move to serve because he needs the distraction of having something to do with his hands, and doing simple tasks for people has always been calming to him. He fills two cups, knowing how she takes her tea without having to ask, and putting forward a plate of cookies even though he's certain that anything he might eat now would come right back up again. Then he finally sits down, trying not to fuss with anything else and actually look at her.]

Ah, so... [And an awkward silence immediately follows.]

[She sits without so much as a word, and while he attempts to focus solely on her, Lux stares at the teacup in front of her. She sits there, shoulders stiff, paralyzed by indecision. All that preparation she did in her head as she walked there went out the window, and she was left without a thing to say.]

So...

[It was painful, that silence. She had to say something. Anything.]

...This is a nice apartment you two have.

[Something that wasn't that.]

[For a moment he just stares at her, as if she just spoke some ancient and incomprehensible language, now long forgotten and dead. And then... then the horrible tension that's around them seems to twang and snap, so abruptly that it's hard to recover for a few moments.

A few moments is apparently what it takes. Fai suddenly finds himself laughing, a bit too hard to be really appropriate or even make sense, but at least laughter is better than what what there was before.]

I'm pretty sure you didn't come here to compliment interior design, Lux.

[That seems to snap her out of whatever funk she was in, the blond blushing. She must have sounded really stupid, huh? She laughs a little too, out of embarrassment.]

I'm sorry. No, no it's not.

[Taking a breath, she swallowed, stomach still in knots.

Say it. Just. Say it.]

Fai, I...

...

Fai, I can't marry you. I'm sorry...

[She just said- She actually said-

Laughter abruptly stopped, Fai for a moment simply stares at the girl sitting opposite him.]

Oh.

[He knows that it's incredibly unhelpful, and that he should be saying something more, but for a long and awkward moment, he's simply at a loss. He'd been going around agonizing over how to tell her, how to find the right words, and he'd never really considered whether maybe Lux had done the exact same thing. How stupid could he be?]

[And of course, unsurprisingly, she had proved to be braver than him.]

[And then it finally hits and he slumps forward, his face leaned heavily in his hands. It really doesn't look like a good reaction until it's followed by these words:] You have no idea how glad I am to hear you say that.

Edited 2014-02-24 04:46 (UTC)

["Oh."

"Oh."

His voice echoed in her ears, such a simple response, but with so much weight. Her hands in her lap clutched at her pant legs without her realizing, shaking.

She couldn't look at him, not when she said it, and not even now. What kind of woman was she? She couldn't marry him; she wasn't fit to. Her own selfish wish to see the world never factored into it.

Taking a breath to speak, Fai beat her to it, and she quickly looked up, eyes wide.]

...What?

[It seemed, at least, that she had been similarily foolish, judging by the taken aback tone. He manages to look up, smiling mostly because he doesn't quite know what to do with himself, and he's just so relieved. He doesn't have to marry her. He doesn't have to spend the rest of his life feeling bad for not loving her as he should, for wanting others that aren't her, for having to force himself even just to kiss her.]

[Savior, he could cry from it. But he'll try hard not to while she's here, or it would just be confusing for her.]

I'm glad, Lux. Because I- I love you. But I love you like a sister, I always have, and I don't want to marry you. It would make us both unhappy, so I'm glad that at least one of us actually managed to spit it out.

Thank you.

Edited 2014-02-24 05:19 (UTC)

[She wasn't sure how to react, whether she should be elated or...

He felt the same. Thank the Savior, he felt the same. That in and of itself was a battle won, and one that she should have initiated much sooner than she had.

Still...]

...How are we going to tell our parents?

[That in itself makes him wince despite still being high on relief, because it's not a pleasant thought. He can hear the accusations already, feel the guilt just waiting to add to the mountain of the stuff he's already carrying around. A failure, a smear on an otherwise untainted legacy, a curse on their family. How selfish, how very selfish, to do what he wants to do, instead of striving to put right what his birth had ruined. His uncle's anger, his father's disappointment, his mother's silent resignation...]

[But Lux is sitting right there, saying she feels the same, and he knows he's not just doing it for his own sake. It was ever just about him. He thinks of waking up next to Imogen for the first time, shame pooling hot and nasty in his stomach, because he'd known it wouldn't be the last. He thinks of that crowded moment with Feliks' breath against his lips, when he'd almost hated Lux for being in the way of kissing the other boy.

She shouldn't have to marry him. She deserved better than that.]

I don't know. But we should do it together. Show them that it's both our decision. Make it harder for them to try to make us change our mind. [He makes a soft, affectionate little sound.] We'll stand by each other. As friends.

[She lowers her head, somehow feeling relieved but at the same time worried for the future. They weren't bound by law, but by obligation. Times were changing. She didn't relish the idea of telling them, but if he was by her side during this...

Lux nods.]

Yeah...

[He knows for a fact that this is only one small problem of many solved on his side of things. Not marrying Lux will just mean that they'll try to find someone else, pressure him even harder. It means another weight of responsibility falling on Yuui, even higher expectations to be the good twin, to somehow fix things. It still doesn't mean it will be any more possible for him to be with whom he wants, if that person happens to be a boy.

Bit it's... something. Something that is right that used to be wrong.]

And they'll most likely think it's mostly my fault anyway. [His tone is teasing; he really isn't trying at all to make her feel guilty.] It'll be alright. They'll be angry, but... they're our family. They want is to be happy.

[They would see her as a failure, a disgrace. She was tasked to carry on the Flourite name, to bring the two families together, and she couldn't manage even that.

But her happiness was more important to her than keeping appearances. Let them think of her how they wanted. She had made friends, was happy with the person that she was outside of the pomp and circumstance.]

It's not your fault, I'll make sure they know that. This was a decision we both came to.

I know. And though we don't exactly have to tell them that... I'm not going to forget that you were the one who was brave enough to finally say it.

[He reaches out over the small table, taking one of her hands in both of his and giving it a small squeeze, smiling. It was... nice to be able to feel more natural around her, to just be friends and not have the unspoken inevitability hanging over them both.]

Let's tell them we both have things we want to do, that we don't want to think about marriage at all for a while. And when we do... it'll be on our own terms, with someone we chose. They won't like it, but they can't force us.

[There is a noticeable blush that crosses her cheeks. She wasn't strong--if anything, she was selfish. The things that they found in the mausoleum, that heart-racing feeling she had, that was what she wanted. Not a life locked away, forced to love someone that she truly couldn't.

She nods.]

That we want to marry for love, not anything else. That there is more to life than obligation.

[He wouldn't agree, if he only knew what she'd been thinking. She is strong to choose what she wanted over the easy thing; choosing happiness over simple complacency and resignation. He'd never properly given her credit for how strong and brave she had always been before now, and he sincerely wishes he could kick himself for it now.]

And even if... if we find love where we don't expect it, or happen to love someone so unsuitable that it turns our lives upside down, we'll still be happier that way, right?

Edited 2014-02-25 23:58 (UTC)

[Lux nods again, a little more confident this time.]

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