[She doesn't push him away. She wants to be comforted. She doesn't want to want that -- she wants to think that she shouldn't need it. That she doesn't deserve it. She looks down, though, her eyes straight on the ground instead of on her mother.]

I know she did. But... it doesn't make it right, to abandon her like that. I didn't deserve to live when they didn't. I could have changed things.

[Her shoulders slump. Her voice cracks, finally, and it sounds small but thick with emotion. She only barely keeps the sob out of her voice, but she isn't hiding the tears so much as keeping her face pointed down at the ground.]

My first thought was to be selfish. I'm not the person that everyone thinks I am. She... she would hate me, if she knew what I was really like.