012 // action - haruka's misfortunes, union edition

[actsmagnificent]

[ Haruka Tenoh is always learning new things. Today's lesson: don't walk your Rhyhorn when the roads are icy. It will slide out of control, sprain people's ankles, and you'll be responsible for picking up their slack on what would happen to be the busiest day of the year at their workplace.

On a completely unrelated note, this dairy booth in the market district appears to be doing a booming business! It's also completely pink - pink drapes, heart-shaped balloons attached to the poles, Miltank plushies lining the shelves, and a Rhyhorn wearing a pink blanket squatting outside with a basket of chocolate in its mouth. Behind the counter (assisted by a Wooper in a pink bow tie) is the most brilliantly handsome salesman ever to grace the street, advertising in a voice that could rattle a packed theater. (She's also wearing a pink apron and a baker's hat shaped like a Luvdisc. Today has a theme.) Her sales pitch goes something like this: ]

Step right up, ladies and gentlemen! What you see here's available for one day only: Luvdisc-shaped chocolate for the health of your romance! Strawberry Miltank milk for the health of your body! And, with a purchase of just twenty-five dollars or more, we'll throw in a special four-piece chocolate sampler as thanks for being our sweetest customers! How about it?!

[ A middle-aged woman walking her Snubbull approaches the vendor. Could she have some Miltank cheese and a Luvdisc chocolate, please? Haruka graces her with her very best Divine Theater smile. ] But of course, Madam. If that's what you desire...

[ The woman looks about ready to faint back onto her Snubbull. Haruka would also dearly love to lose consciousness right now. Why is she so good at this? It's absurd to think she might be naturally gifted at spouting nonsense!

At least she's only served strangers thus far. ]

Comments

[victimlessdetails]

[Isabela's just going to...stop.]

...I almost want to buy something out of pity, now. Was that what you were going for?

[actsmagnificent]

[ .....Haruka is very glad she went on a ruins trek with this woman before this happened, not after. She also would dearly like to snark right back, but there are other customers watching and if she drives people away from the business, that's the same as if she hadn't stepped in to fill the usual worker's shoes at all.

So she wills herself to smile. ] It'd be a shame to miss out for any reason.

[ Here, have a chocolate. It's not a bribe or anything. ] Sample, milady?

[victimlessdetails]

Pfft, "milady" is my mother.

[She takes the chocolate, though.]

[actsmagnificent]

As you say. Miss.

[ For some odd reason you just aren't "Skitty" material, though. Wooper, seeing Haruka is going to wait and see whether Isabela eats her chocolate, starts dancing across the display case. ] Woop woop woop!

[victimlessdetails]

Oh hello there. Saw some of you guys in the swamp, didn't I?

[She pops the chocolate in her mouth and chews appreciatively while offering the Wooper a pat on the head. After she finishes, though...]

Say, weren't you some big name actor?

[Gender-neutral term used intentionally. She has no idea what this person's stage persona is, and she might want to keep it up.]

[actsmagnificent]

....I've been in a few. [ Haruka doesn't look particularly keen to broadcast that regardless of terms, however. Wooper, on the other hand, likes this change of subject, and begins to "woop" with abandon. He has the best idea for a play! They should do one about singing and dancing in the rain! ] Woop! Wooooop woop woopwoop woop!

Would you like to order anything?

[ It's a small step from "actor" to "why are you selling dairy products, then"....but this isn't an attempt at preventing that step. Nope. Yep. ]

[victimlessdetails]

[She sighs. She may be an evil pirate, but she really shouldn't be That Customer.]

Give me one of those strawberry milks and give me a call later, eh? Nothing pervy, your girlfriend looked too suspiciously pleasant for me to risk messing with her.

[actsmagnificent]

[ ...it takes her a moment, and then she smirks. ] I don't know what you're talking about.

[ That tone of voice says she does. Haruka reaches back into an icebox for Isabella's milk. ] Will that be all?

[ She has to admit, she's intrigued that Isabella would want to speak with her. Especially given the only circumstances in which they've interacted thus far. ]

[victimlessdetails]

For now. I won't hold you up any further.

[Too big of a crowd for armed robbery after all haha no seriously it would take too much effort.]

[actsmagnificent]

[ Haruka hears you about effort. This is taking up all her non-god-hunting effort for, like, a month. Jeez.

She grins. ] Later, then. Skitty.

[ ....It's an experiment, okay. ]

[victimlessdetails]

If we're going with pet names, I'll take "Captain", thanks.

[She says it with a smirk, though.]

[actsmagnificent]

I'll remember that.

[ And then pointedly not use it today. As you do. ]